I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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