dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Randomize
