My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
