i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
