Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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