i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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