yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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