no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
