Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
