What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
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His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
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Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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