I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Randomize
