brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
