Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize