When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize