..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
