My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
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