he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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