I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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