I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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