i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
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