This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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