carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
