I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Randomize
