i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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