haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
We have started to decorate penises.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
