It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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