making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize