you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
