Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
