There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
