i just google imaged poop.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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