i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
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You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
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Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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