PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
