and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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