I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
