That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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