he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
