yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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