Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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