i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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