She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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