therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
