She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
