Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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