Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Randomize
