bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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