can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
