You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
