i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
