if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
